But I Love Bears...

They say he was okay and was released the next day, so I think that makes it okay to laugh.

Old Love

From August 26, 2002 through July 5, 2004, Eric Gagne pitched the 9th inning of every Dodgers game to put out the opposing teams last offensive gasp, and never once failed. That streak of 84 consecutive saves streak was a stretch of domination not seen in Dodger blue since Orel Hershiser carried the 1988 Dodgers through the playoffs. From 2002 to 2004, no batter stood a chance against him.

Going to Dodger games then was like trying to observe a rare bird in the wild.
- He only appeared in certain situations, if the conditions were just right - in the 8th or 9th inning, if the team was ahead by 3 or less runs, to be the hammer that finished off the opponent's last gasp offense.
- When he did appear, it was with a flourish - the stadium's speakers boomed the first few notes to GnR's "Welcome to the Jungle," and 50,000+ would stand and cheer in unison as a fat man jogged from the outfield to the mound.
- You knew you were watching something special with each appearance - the nature of a streak that involves consecutiveness is that each attempt matches or exceeds the drama of the prior attempt before. Failure in any outing puts you back at square one. We shared in his history, validated his dominance with our cheers. It’s one thing to read in a newspaper that he had struck out three batters in order; it was another thing altogether to watch him befuddle major league baseball players, embarrassing them in ways they probably hadn’t experienced since little league.

For those years, he was far and away the city’s favorite Dodger. His last two years with the team were injury plagued, and he was never healthy enough to recapture the mojo from that streak. His contract ended last year, and this year he’s with another team (unfortunately, now on their disabled list). But in my mind, the magic from that streak has never dulled.

Then I read this over at Dodger Thoughts...

Is it to soon to wonder whether we'll remember Takashi Saito's Dodger career with the same joy - if perhaps not the same electricity - as Eric Gagne's?

Saito lowered his Dodger and MLB career ERA to 2.00, with 126 strikeouts in 94 1/3 innings. This season, he has struck out 19 and walked one.

And then there's that smile. Honestly, has the Dodger franchise ever enjoyed a better smile than Saito's? It really might be the greatest grin in this town since Magic's. With those stats, sliders and smiles, I look forward to seeing Saito more than any Dodger pitcher since Gagne.

I can’t agree that Saito’s surprising success has healed the loss of a fan favorite, a lonely bright spot in a span of seasons that bore few other successes. But he has helped us to forget, maybe quicker than any of us thought we would.

A brief statistical interlude, if I may. It’s hard to gauge which pitchers are better when compared side-by-side, because styles, ballpark dimensions and team defense vary. One statistic I like to use is ERA+, because it takes into consideration ballpark factors (e.g., Dodger Stadium is a great park for pitchers, Great Ameriquest Field in Arlington, TX heavily favors hitters) and the league average performance of pitchers to normalize their performances. An average pitcher would have an ERA+ of 100, so scores above and below 100 would be respectively above and below average performers for that year. First, look at Eric Gagne’s ERA+ from 2000 through 2006.
2000: 84
2001: 85
2002: 192
2003: 335 (!)
2004: 189
2005: 150 (injury shortened year)
In 2003, he won the Cy Young Award for the best pitcher in the National League. 2000 and 2001 were the years he was a starting pitcher, and he was a below average pitcher. When they moved him into the closer’s role in 2002, his performance skyrocketed. Now, compare these numbers to Takashi Saito’s numbers from the last two years as Gagne’s heir apparent.
2006: 222 (came in 8th place in Cy Young voting)
2007: 289
Saito’s number are downright outrageous for a guy who was an average pitcher in Japan for 12 years, was picked up off the scrap heap for pennies by the Dodgers, and then proceeded to mow down the competition. What are the odds after losing a once-in-a-lifetime relief pitcher, the Dodgers find a near equal value replacement, for a fraction of the price? It’s unheard of.

Stylistically, they’re very different pitchers. Gagne was power pitcher with deadly offspeed options that left the batters guessing, usually guessing wrong. He could throw a 96-98 mph fastball, but then could follow it up with a 78 mph Bugs Bunny changeup. Sprinkle in a mid 80s curveball and a slider, and he easily overpowered batters. On the other hand, Saito really only has one terrific pitch, his slider. It has great movement that makes batters swing and miss, but with a fastball that only tops out at about 92-94, he relies on his location and his wits to trick opposing hitters. While Gagne had freaskish talent and power, Saito has to outsmart the other side with what he lacks in physical tools. It’s hard to say that Saito’s only been getting by on smoke and mirrors, because the results have been so good for going on two years now. It feels like a fluke, like at some point his numbers from the Japanese league will catch up to him as batters see him a second time around. Or, maybe he’ll be like Gagne, and he just possesses some kind of killer instinct that shuts down the other side when they most need a hit.

Saito is truly great. His exuberance is a beacon on a team whose leadership is largely decaying and stoic (with a few exceptions). Few sportsmen have energized this plastic metropolis the way Eric Gagne used to. Saito doesn’t stick people in their seats the way Gagne did after the 7th inning, but you can’t argue with his results.

To Kick Off My Allergy Harried Summer

I have this video.

A Measure of Hubris

Can a man compress 1000 pages of legal remedies case history and commentary into a 20 page outline, and then reproduce it intelligently in an exam one week later?

I will let you know next Friday.

This is What You Get When You Spell Your Name "Darin"

I refuse to start with the cursory "I'm sure he's a nice guy and all," because I have no evidence of that. All I have evidence of is that this man stole a lot of money from the Angels with his ginormous contract and substandard play. Now, he's the south side of Chicago's problem.

This Could Be the Next Big Prison Tattoo, Too

I thought the Dodgers/Giants rivalry was pretty bad. The worst that could happen to you if you're wearing brown and orange in Dodger stadium is probably getting hit in the head by a D cell battery. Apparently people take their futbol (soccer) much more seriously.

Buenos Aires, Argentina (AHN) - A tattoo artist from Argentina is facing a lawsuit after drawing a penis on the back of an Argentinean football fan instead of his favorite team's official logo.

Reports said the teenager approached the tattoo artist and asked him to tattoo the logo of the Boca Junior football team on his back.

However, the tattooist was an avid supporter of the rival team and decided to play a prank on his young customer.

After reaching home, the victim proudly showed his parents his new tattoo and was surprised to learn that a penis was tattooed on his back.

Take The Deal: America Loves Barbaro Edition

So you say you've shot a convenience store owner over $200 and the D.A. is offering you 3 years and probation? If you don't take the deal, this is the type of person that will be sitting on your jury, deciding your fate.

A Perfect Storm of Sports and Shakespeare

Some very clever writers over at The DCenters (a blog for the DC United MLS team) put together a starting 11 for Shakespeare's soccer team, plus the bench and managers. Pretty much the dorkiest thing going on the net as of 10:08 p.m., Pacific time.

STARTING XI
Goalkeeper: Brutus (Julius Caesar) – Your keeper should be cool, unflappable, like Brutus, who won't take a night off even if his wife kills herself by swallowing fire.

Full-back: Marina (Pericles, Prince of Tyre) – If she guards the right flank as well as she guarded her chastity, attackers will find the box difficult to penetrate.

Center-back: Henry V (Henry IV, Henry V) – After some shaky moments during Henry IV when his passion for the game was questioned, this young prospect demonstrates strong abilities to organize a back line and is great in International competition. Just elected captain.

Center-back: Titus Andronicus -- The great defender of Rome is stout on the pitch, but can occasionally make odd choices in his distribution. Makes up for it with great service (both on the pitch and at the dinner table).

Full-back Goneril: (King Lear) -- Confident in handling the part of the land allocated for her, Goneril may get caught ball-watching occasionally and never seems grateful for the role she gets on the pitch.

Right Midfielder: Falstaff (Henry IV, The Merry Wives of Windsor) – Aging star popular with the fans (think 2002 Marco Etcheverry), pops up unexpectedly in odd places and seems to defy time. Was supposed to be in the starting line-up for Henry V, but was stripped of captaincy and lead role by Hal, and may be on the way out as nights out with George Best catch up with him.

Center Defensive Midfielder: Shylock (The Merchant of Venice) – Opposing attackers find it difficult to charge through midfield when this Demo Kovalenko-esque midfielder takes his pound of flesh.

Center Attacking Midfielder: Iago (Othello) – What should your #10 be? Crafty, and they don't get much craftier than Iago, whose use of misdirection and playing others through is unparalleled. Sure, he's still upset that he was passed over for Othello for the Italian team, but professionals can get beyond that, right?

Left Midfielder: Duke Vincentio (Measure for Measure) – Excellent two-way player, both in dictating the attack and in performing the down and dirty work of tracking back and defending.

Center Forward: Macbeth – He can strike and finish, but plays withdrawn constantly checking back for the ball and looking for players ghosting out on runs. Occasionally overconfident, when he scores it's a dagger to the opposition.

Striker: Othello – Charges headlong on whatever Iago sends him to chase, occasionally acts too quickly for his own good, but that's what you want in a striker.

Manager: King Lear -- Replaced Polonius earlier this season. Emphasized simple play and tactics – "Divide we our formation in three!" May lose his cool towards the end of the season or in bad weather. If season does not end well, may be replaced by Propsero who supposedly retired, but is said to be itching to get back in the game.

Former Manager: Polonius (Hamlet) – Like Ray Hudson, he was quick to the quip in the locker room until the front office realized they had no idea what he was going on about.

BENCH

Goalkeeper: Cordelia (King Lear) – Biding her time on the bench until her father realizes she has something to offer.

Defense: MacDuff (Macbeth) – Need a steadying defense at the end? MacDuff can shut a game down and make opponents feel that their grasp of the game was "untimely rip'd"

Midfielder: Puck (A Midsummer Night's Dream) – Fast, mischievous, Puck'll do whatever it's told in order to sow confusion among the opponent's defense, and is clever enough on the ball to make any marker look like an ass.

Midfielder: Ariel (The Tempest) – Sometimes you need a bit of magic on the ball, and Ariel is a great choice. Excellent at winning midfield headers, like most Elemental Internationals.

Midfielder: Hamlet -- Transfer listed, he never seems to have settled in and lacks confidence in his decision making. May have been affected by the death of his father, it is hoped that a transfer back to Elsinore FC where he'll be closer to mother and girlfriend (Bianca.... er, Ophelia) will provide him the comfort level to flourish.

Forward: Lady Macbeth (Macbeth) – When Macbeth can't get it done, she'll come into the game and finish it off.

Forward: Ulysses (Troilus and Cressida) [on loan from Ithaca United] – Excellent at picking the lock of another team's impenetrable fortress, and popular for talking with other players and coaxing the best performance out of them. Many fans demanding he see regular starting time, but they're just a bunch of Homers.

INJURED RESERVE

Midfielder: Richard III – Leg and back problems plaguing this potential star, rumors of a bad attitude also surround him.